this little guy is the eldest grandchild for both set of his grandparents. and naturally, for that, his leadership skills has shown quite distinctively among his other siblings and cousins. he takes care of his charges well, a very responsible chap, i can say. well, being a kid that he is, he has his tantrums too. he is very manja compared to the rest of my kids. not that i have any favorites, but this little guy connects with me well. he can just sit on my lap while the rest can just run around, playing with themselves.
even in one of the conversation, i asked him, if its ok if i ever get married. and he just shooked his head, saying that if i ever get married, and if i have my own kids, i wld not love him as much as i do now, and he wont be my baby anymore, and he wont be able to sit on my lap again. i told him that he is just being silly. none of that will never happen shld i get married one day, insya-allah.
i remembered the day he was born. i was already on the way to the bus stop after my classes. i was half-way thru down the hill at SIM, when i received a voicemail on my pager. i dunno why, but i actually went back to my dept just to hear the voicemail. and i was glad i did just that. in the voicemail, bapak said that i am now an aunty. i went straight to east.shore that same afternoon. he is such a beautiful baby(he still is!!). he didnt even cry on his first day. and it was hard for him to open up his small eyes. he still have very small eyes that will always be gone whenever he smiles. hehe... mata sepet.
yesterday, it was his 8th birthday. managed to talk to him only after my 4th try. talk for a bit, and then, he asked me, "cik naz, u know its my bday, and why didnt u come back for my bday?" and why i told him that i got work to do, he said again, " u tell your boss lah that it is your nephew's bday and u have to come back."
my tears just rolled down my cheeks when he said that. for that instance, i feel that i am a bad aunty who cant even be back for her kids bday. i felt useless last nite, it was just bad.
i'm sorry, khair that i missed your bday. its not that i dont want to come back, and its not that i love u any lesser by not being there on your bday. the six of u are my everything. i love u all the same.
happy birthday, abang khair. hope u enjoyed your cake and the fireworks. nanti bila cik naz balik, kita potong cake lagi, okies. kita potong cake ngan khaider and ayah sekali. muacks....
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5/2/07 09:06